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Eric Zoolander is right. Being a model is a big responsibility with a comparably big paycheck at the end of the shoot.

So, help us to help you..by acting like a real pro model. Here are some handy hints casually dressed as rigid as iron rules thou should obey whilst prancing semi-nekkid in front of our camera lenses!

1.  Arrive on time. Ok, I'm starting with the simple ones but you'd be surprised how many models fall into the trap of pissing off the camera crew BEFORE they've even arrived! If you arrive more than a half an hour late without a fair excuse (see note.13) we may cancel your shoot without a kill fee or a re-booking.

2.  Dirty girl's are what we want but dirty as in grubby fingernails, unwashed hair, hairy armpits, unshaved or unwaxed pubic areas is definitely not what we want. Please ensure you arrive clean, you're welcome to leave dirty.

3.  Markings such as tattoos, bruises, scars, stretch marks, spots, acne, shaving rashes should be mentioned before the shoot. Most of the time we can fix marks but only if we are made aware of them before the shoot.

4.  Arriving with basic makeup on with concealer for any zits or blemishes is very cool and will earn you diva-like treatment or atleast a cup of tea.

5.  The photos you send us should be recent. Changes in weight, appearance, such as haircuts or hair color, suntans, fake tans should not be a surprise to us on shoot day.

6.  We don't want no creepy guy chaperones at our shoots or giggling girlfriends - unless they're better looking than you. If you're scared ask us for references.

7.  Your health is important during shoot time, so inform us of your allergies or conditions such as epilepsy, personal disabilities or injuries such as weak shoulder sockets, anal fissures, new dentures...seriously, let us know before the shoot. (see note.13)

8.  Let us know if you have any personal needs such as smoking, diabetes, stutters or praying to mecca you need us to provide for before the shoot.

9.  Do not turn up to the shoot drunk or drugged. Let's wait until after ok?

10. Agreed levels prior to shoots are taken as formal confirmations between model and Benson Media.
We will respect your limits and not cross the line. We ask the same from you - if you refuse to work to the levels agreed upon by both parties your shoot may be cancelled and no 'kill fee' will be issued. This includes walking off set like a diva, you will not be paid. You will be wasting everyone's time.

11. Some of our websites such as Petgirls require a basic level of fitness. For example, if crawling around on all fours is beyond your athletic capabilities you should reconsider working for us and consider joining a gym.

12. Please do your homework! Research the websites we want you to work with us on. Their URLS are listed at the bottom of our emails to you.

13. Cancellations. Please give us atleast 24 hours notice of intention to cancel. Canceling on the day without a really valid excuse is not sexy. (see below)

If we cancel the shoot 3 days or less prior to the shoot - we will pay you a £50 'kill fee'.

14. If you're ill with the Flu, a cold virus, throat infection, crab lice or anything contagious do not show up at our shoot hoping to get a Badge for Bravery.

If you infect us with your germs you are affecting our entire office and our ability to function effectively. Not cool!

15. Lastly. Mucho importante - bring atleast one piece of Photo ID - passport, drivers license is perfect.
Fail to bring your Photo ID and you fail to shoot with us and fail to get paid. Simple as that.

Let me make that crystal clear to you - BRING PHOTO ID to the shoot.

Ok, regarding Note.12. It's so obvious it makes me wanna puke but here goes:

If you work for 'Yellowhore' it will involve watersports and bdsm.

If you work for 'Bukkakeslave' it will involve lots of big willies and spunk.

If you work for 'Petgirls' it will involve crawling on your knees (arthritic and unfit models should not apply).

If you work for 'TigerrJuggs' it will involve you being kissed, groped, fingering or spanked by Queen of Obscene Miss Tigerr Benson. Phew!

OK, so most of this is quite clearly common sense and you might feel patronised. Well don't cos this advice is for that small majority of retarded girls that cross our threshold. If you find that insulting then tough shit cos I actually find retarded girls quite hot. I wasn't being anti-retarded, so there.

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